Changes

Life is always a big change. Nothing ever stays the same. In the life style we live that couldn't be more true. We don't only have the ever changing Navy work schedule to adopt to, or the changed return of an underway, or the lengthened deployment. These are can be especially difficult. Not just because it interrupts the flow of your daily routine or your plans, but because sometimes you need to drop everything to accommodate the changes. We recently dealt with it, but it was a nice surprise for the girls. They did not have a clue their dad was unexpectedly home again. We were not expecting him for another two weeks when I went and picked him up. It was difficult to manage only because everything had to pushed aside to make sure he wasn't left with no ride. Anyhow, we got him home and things have found a flow again. It seems no matter how hard you try to keep the same flow from when they were gone it just doesn't work. It always seems to change.

It didn't keep us from getting things done. We just had to move them around to different times to accommodate the abrupt change. I will say it is definitely nice that he came home early and we get a few extra days with him before he has to head back out. Not sure how many extra days it gives us, but it is more then we thought it was going to be in the first place. Living this life you get used to the unknown and the flexible schedules. Everything is subject to change even when you think it might be to late in the game for it to change. You learn to take it all at face value and remember it could change at any time. 

Every now and then we might get angry with how things are or how they effect our lives, but at the end of the day living this life has been such a blessing. The things it has allowed us to do, the countries we have been able to live in and visit have brought a better sense of culture for the girls. They have seen history in life and touched things from the past people only hear or see in a book. Mostly, because of the Navy making it possible....and maybe some bingo playing, too!! 

It brings on a lot of learning. Learning about yourself, your kids, family and friends. You learn to lean on yourself and you realize how strong and independent you really are. Although, there maybe times when you really don't feel that way. I know this is true for me a lot in the past. I think during his deployment when he first got here and deployed out with the ship. But it made me open my eyes are realize I am that strong person and I am independent. I can do life with him away. It isn't easy and man can it be lonely and stressful, but I can do it. We are quickly approaching another time where we will be living apart for several months. I am ready, to a point, if you can be ready for it. It will be different then the deployment.

You find a support system to put in place and surround yourself with friends who will help get through the tough days and weeks. You find enjoyment in the places where you may not have found it before. We like to celebrate all the things we don't really celebrate when we are all together. It gives us something fun to look forward to, but it also helps us to make it feel less hard. Being apart and far away from most of our family will always be hard, but we will forever be thankful for our life and the opportunities it has given us. 

We are stronger for it.......even apart!!

Underways

Navy life bring with it special challenges for families. We sometimes spend a lot a time living apart instead of together. Sometimes we split our living together and apart times with a ship, deployment, TAD's or TDY's. It all brings it's own set of challenges, changed routines, new out look on how to get things done, loneliness and yes even emptiness. This time can be especially trying for some. Our family is not exception to this. However, we try hard to embrace it. Wake up to a new a day, one less on the count down chain, and a new beginning. A new beginning because this new day has the chance to be something special, to not be like the day was yesterday, to not be as hard. Some days are really challenging mentally, emotionally and some days even physically.

We have entered into this part of our life again. Except right now we are lucky. He will only be gone for a short time. He is underway on the ship is currently working on. They are doing whatever it is the Navy has told them they need to do in order to have the ship ready for deployment. We call it playing in the ocean because it sounds much better then I don't really know what they are doing. Something in this life we are not authorized to know. That's fine by me. It means less to worry about.  However, you still stand by worrying about things you have zero control over. It is a strange thing at times.

We live one day at a time. On the hard days we live one second, one minute or one moment at a time. Just waiting for that day to end so a new one can start and it can be better then it was. Hard days are part of the process. It's almost like having a law. If it is always easy it would be something everyone would want to do. This life sure isn't for everyone. It is hard. It is lonely. It takes far away from family and sometimes it leaves you without any support. You have to learn to plug yourself into programs, groups and neighbors to make connections so you aren't left behind, in a sense. It can be dark at times, but the light is always within reach if you push ahead for it.

We go through a process while being separated. It's kind of like going through the grieving process. All the different steps of it. While some seem to mirror those you feel while grieving they can be very different and can happen at different times during the process. For us, we seem to be at the end. When counting down the days is exciting instead of being taxing or seem like it will never get here. This period will unfortunately be short lived. He will come home and be here for short amount of time and then he will return to the water. It is a job he loves and he loves being on the water. He loves his career, most of the time, and I honestly couldn't imagine him doing anything at this point. We take these moments in stride because they are always temporary. Even, when that temporary feels like eternity. 

I couldn't imagine my life or my families life being any different then it is now. We have grown and learned so much living this life style. I will sad when it does finally end and we have to be in one place "forever." We always refer to that as our "forever" home. I am left wondering at times if we will ever have a "forever" home because I can see us getting antsy staying in one place for long long periods of time. We haven't lived in a signal place for longer then 4 years. I see us getting antsy here as his time for moving to a new command is just around the corner. It will bring lots of changes. Especially for him, but for us we will still be here in our home that we are in now. Still doing some of the same things we are doing now. Only time can tell where we will end up when this chapter closes. For now, we just live in the moments and take each one in stride to see what happens next. It is an unknown journey and the path isn't always clear, but we definitely navigate it together one step at a time.